Well, it's a holiday weekend ... It's a time when folks get together and sooner or later the stories start.  Our topic this year turned into a discussion on lawn mowing. My wife started it by pointing out that I don't mow properly. I make little squares and sometimes I mow in big squares. Apparently that isn't right. My defense is that we live on a gravel road with a dead end sign.. Traffic is pretty low... Besides, I've never in my entire life heard someone say something to the effect " That John Doe sure is a strange one. He doesn't mow his lawn perfectly straight" This led to a girl chiming in that her husband forbids her to mow as her lines aren't perfectly straight. Well, they live in town, so maybe he has a point. Another gal for some reason wound up on the rider and I'm not sure how it came about but her husband got her started and then left for town. She didn't know how to turn it off! She claims she drove it around the yard till it ran out of gas.   Hard to believe? Well, this next one is true!! Friends of ours, here in Southern MN got a call from their son in law who lives in the Twin Cities. His mower had stopped and he couldn't get it going. They drove all the way up there only to tell him that the thing in back of the mower was a bagger and it needed to be emptied. Are you ready????? Their son in law is a college professor!!!! Ok, it's my turn... I refuse to disclose how many years I have had this old push mower for trimming. Pushing it up and down the hills ..Then last fall I slipped a bit and my hand grabbed onto the lever on top of the handle... It took off!!! Oh no!!  It's self propelled!!! I won't say how many years I had pushed this thing. So, will things be better this spring? Nope, it won't start..